nEw bEginniNg

8 hours away from a new year, a new beginning.

Was just talking to a close friend about how the year (2008) has been for me and I surprised myself completely when I said " It's been good for me, no complaints!!"

In retrospect, it honestly has been a year full of surprises. So much has changed in me and the people around me, a 360 degree change. Not that I didn't have me "down and out" moments in 2008, but its the outlook and the perspective that has changed.

2008 too bought with it a considerable amount of downers, but for a change the good things are over shadowing the bad ones in my life. Yes I have had my share of Failures and downfalls, relationships gone sour (and how), fights, misunderstandings,,but thankfully all this has changed my perspective towards life in a positive way and I am not looking back at the year with sorrow and all things lost. Instead, Iam look back and see all the good things and the Superb people and memories that form a part of this positive outlook. Every single loss in 2008 made me look at life in a different light.

But my friend pointed out that perhaps 2008 has been one of the worst years for alot of people around me and the world on the whole. Recession, Terror Attacks, Financial slowdown of the world economy et al.

2009 is going to be better for sure, all we need is a fresh start at this point.

8 hours away from the new year I hope that 2009 brings with it alot of good luck and lots of love for all my friends :P

Sadly one thing that has remained constant for all the 31st's of my life is that I am going to be home and bring in the new year with the remote in my hand. Hope at least this changes next year atleast :), but if it doesn't then no complaints.

Wish you all A verY haPPy new Year 2009!!!

a piCtuRe 's worth A thousAnd wOrdS

Mumbai saw an unprecedented turnout for the rally at the gateway in memory of the Mumbai attacks a week one after the event.

Even though I couldn't make it coz of health issues, but I have been seeing pictures all over and hearing stories from colleagues and friends who did go for it (wearing I Love Mumbai tees)

Looking at the huge turnout while watching the news gave me such a different feeling, wish I could have been there :(

Came across a couple of pics from a school friend's facebook album--people came up with some very witty one liners at the peace march. Here they go-------------------

The next one is my Favourite :)

iNsaNe----iNaNe

Iam sure no one has ever watched the news so intently, as much as we did in the past one week!!

The terror attack or whatever you call it, has surely shaken us all up. Imagine being stuck in your room in one of the most prestigious hotels in the country, hearing gun shots and grenade attacks, not knowing where to go or what to do. When you don't know whats awaiting you on the other side of the door, whether its the person who is going to shoot in the chest or save you from the bullets.

Last night I was watching a debate on NDTV, on the panel they had known faces from every field. The audience had survivors from the attack, and trust me each of them had such moving stories to tell.

Everyone whom I know, knows someone who was there during the attacks.

The newspapers, news channels, fm channels, facebook status' cant seem to get over this whole incident (thankfully) and are trying in some way or the other to not let this pass as just another thing that happened in Mumbai.

What's most ridiculous is the way some politicians have come out and made the most heartening statements. The Home Minister (state) got one dialogue straight out of the famous Bollywood movie, little did he know that this is no time to talk like King Khan.

Out of the many questions on every single Mumbaikar's mind is "where were the Thackeray's?"

The few politicians that did manage to come and show face didn't get a warm welcome either.

In fact even on the NDTV show yesterday with Barkha Dutt, none of the politicians were even ready to have a video conference and face a couple of questions from the audience, the only person who dared to come on the show was the Congress spokesperson who ended the show by calling the audience Hostile.

During those 3 days I remember getting up every morning and asking my dad to put on the news and tell me if it was over, coz if it wasn't then it meant yet another day off at work. It felt like I was checking the score during an Indo- Pak 5 day test series.

We did manage to come to work on Friday and trust me it wasn't quite a memorable day.

Half way through the day we got frantic calls saying that the terrorist's were out on the road in a white car shooting anyone and everyone in sight. None of us in office knew what to do, whether we should choose to stay back in office (not that we could concentrate) or get back home ASAP. Every time the door of the office opened it sent shivers down my back bone.

There have been innumerable candle marches and Peace rallies, but lets face it, what beyond all of this?? What are we going to do to change the F**ed up system governing our country. The celebrities on the show thought that not paying Taxes would surely change the way things are and the Financial Capital would be taken a little more seriously, after all we contribute 45% to the total tax of the country. But did we forget that not paying taxes would mean that we would have to pay a fine which is 100% your tax amount. So we would land up paying double the amount, so at that rate we would contribute 90% to the total tax payment of the country.

Mumbai's helplessness is as also known as the city's Resilience.

Its not the spirit of the city but a bout of Collective Amnesia.

I hope things do change and life does become a little safer for us to stay without the fear of being shot while walking on the streets of a city that "Never Sleeps."

I have always wanted to go to the Taj, but never managed to, I hope Mr Ratan Tata does restore it back to its old heritage structure which will have alot more stories to tell now.

IF

The One and Only thing that I really want, need and wish right now is a trip to London.

Not cause I love that city alot but because the one who means the most to me is in that part of the world.

There are moments and incidents in life when you hate the way life is going for you only because the most easy thing seems unattainable. When you really want to do something but cant cause of financial constraints or some other god forsaken damn reason.

This is worse when your life hanging is by just this one moment and you cant do anything about it as you are tied down.

The inability to get what you want and desire can cause such a mental imbalance (yeah i know I am getting too preachy)

Its been 2 years since I went to London to meet Ankita, and trust me these 2 years have flown. I remember the jitters we both had when I had submitted my papers for a visa as I was a bit skeptical on getting one and I did this after having a huge fight with you and wondering if you even make me stay with you. But it was worth the risk :P

The whole process of my parents agreeing on sending me to an unknown place alone just for one person, me sitting on an 8 hour flight. Now that was my first flight abroad and I was hoping that I would have some interesting company in the 2 seats next to me, but I landed up sharing my seat with an old Gujarati couple who didn't know Hindi, so I was the official translator for them, translating everything from apple juice to caramel custard (oh this needs another post altogether). The wait for my baggage ( 1 hour), to heading out and not recognising you, if it wasnt for your dad I would have stood at Heathrow for probably the next hour or so :) without any mode of communcation.

Overall the whole trip got us better with each day and trust me it was worth all the tension, drama and the rubbish that happened back home with my parents as none of the relatives approved of my Lonely Venture to a "foreign land" just to meet my best friend was just not digested by them. All this non sense didn't make even one percent of a difference once I was there with you.

All the random roaming on the streets of London without a Motive or destination made the journey even sweeter, every trip to your school was a pleasure and worth the walk in the winter, all the fights and arguments felt dismal as being there made it easier to solve them.


This is one the many moments when I ticked you off or embarrassed you by doing something stupid or crossing the road badly (like any Indian would lol ).

Listening for LOVE

How often do you confess your love to the one's that really make a difference.

Personally I find it very weird to go upto my dad or mum and say "I Love U."

Probably the only person I can say "I love you" without any reason or event and not feel funny about it is Ankita.

I was chatting with a childhood friend a couple of days and in the midst of a very serious conversation he told me that if someone doesnt say 'those three words' doesnt mean that they dont love u. He told me that if a close friend isnt talking to me doesnt mean that she doesnt love me anymore. They just convey their TLC through their actions. We kind of landed up arguing on this as I just didnt get the point.

I played this whole conversation over in my head yesterday and I realised how true this whole thing was and how most of us shy away from conveying our feelings through words and expect the other person to understand and interpret every action of yours.

There are moments when we really need to convey our feelings and need to tell the other person how much we love them, but there is this whole fear about expressing the love we feel.

We are sometimes very strange people. The only thing we want to say and the only one thing we should say is the one thing we dont say. According to me this is one of the most vital reasons why relationships fall apart.

People who were very important and meant the world to you at some point, no longer know what you upto just because you had lost the opportunity to hold it all together just by saying what you feel for them and what they meant to you.

But since the feeling is so strong and real, and the need to say it so high, we are driven to use other words and the meaning is never communicated the way we intend it to be conveyed.

The other person is left feelings unwanted and unloved.

Therefore we need to listen for love in the words that people are saying to us.

We have to listen for love in those around us. If we listen intently we will discover that we are alot more loved than we realise :)