Weirdo that Iam

I hope i don't freak anyone out with the following post :)

I have to admit that i have this weird fascination for fingers, I know i may seem psycho but fingers are one of the first things that i notice when i meet someone new.

The other day dad and me went for OSO and when we came back home mum wanted to know how it was and blah blah blah..
she asked both of us how Deepika has performed!!Dad was all praise for her and then she turned to me and asked me if Deepika was good..the only thing i told her was "mum she has th longest fingers i have ever seen." I think I freaked my mum out with that statement of mine.
People would generally notice someones smile o maybe eyes in the initial meeting but i would notice the persons fingers.
People around me are quite aware of this weird fascination of mine.

My bhabhi learnt of this a couple of weeks back and asked me who is my favourite in this whole weirdo thing (yeah i do have favourites).
And prompt came the reply- My best friend
well thats not because she is my best buddy but i really like her fingers alot..and she knows it.

and the addition to this list now is Deepika Padukone, although it makes me wonder how she must be holding the badminton racket as she was a national badminton player before she switched to modelling. Now i have played badminton all through my childhood and i know it can be quite shitty to hold the racket if you have long fingers.

anways iam outta this place now before you guys think i have lost it.
(this post is out of sheer boredom sitting in office with not much to do)

Love Hate

Love and Hate are two very similar feelings. While hate blinds you from something until its past, love pushes you forward so fast that you can’t see it until it’s past.
A friend is someone who helps you out in both the situations. After all, they’re just emotions that describe petty likes and dislikes. But they’re both similar and dangerous. I’d kill in love, and I’d kill in hate. Hell, you’ll say, I’d even kill for friends, so my personal opinion doesn’t matter. But how far is your truth from mine?
Anyways, I’ll rather be back on the point. Well, a friend, apart from being a savior is much more. He’s the one who helps you imbalance the equation between hope and its perfect anti matter, disappointment. This friend would care for you in the day, and continue in the night. He’ll repeat this until your world is dismal no more. I’m weird, I agree. I can be the most protective, and possessive friend. I can even expect to be cared for. Shame on me! Whatever happened to “tu karam karta chal, fal ki icchha mat kar”!
This friend is sorry for not speaking to a friend today, for he didn't know what to say. I just want to say I care for you a lot more than I can say. He’ll stay away, and never bother you in any way, and all this friend can say today, is that this friend is sorry. Sorry for whatever I did wrong, although I wish that whatevere it was, was told to me before a decision was taken.

it hurts when a decision is going to affect your life in a huge way and your not even considered to be told about it.

the result of it is just put on you and YOU ALONE have to deal with it at the end of the day.

The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost and never got back!!!

zzzzzzz

In office right now getting bored to death..
don't know what to do..
have a family pooja in the evening which i cant even ditch cause parents aren't around so i have to be there on their behalf as well..so ya basically have a boring day ahead as well..it ain't helping being alone *sob*
so missing my parents to the core..
its so weird to to get up and find the house empty
pack my own lunch (usually dad does it)
go back to an empty house..
spend the night alone
I'am sure all of us take alot of people for granted in life
and when we don't have those same people around
when they have moved on and are not a part of your life
you realise what it was to have them and what a fool you have been to hurt them by taking them for granted
yeah i have heard this a million times that the people you love the most are taken for granted
so you should feel special if someone around you takes you for granted hehehehehhehehe

just saw Laaga chunari mein daag on cable (ya it was pirated iam sure)

wasnt in the best frame of mind to see a heavy movie..one that would make me think..

make me think about how some people can be so selfish and some so selfless



in the movie rani is made to earn money the unethical way ( if i may call it) coz people back home need to survive..

she needs the money to make sure everything back home goes well..she goes all out to make sure that things are fine back home even if that means she has to live in the fast lane



life is so funny it makes you do things you would never even think of in your wildest of dreams..

sometimes we do things just to see a smile on the face of the person we love..

then there are times when you do stuff just to make sure that you dont lose that someone..who wants it the other way..

when in love you would walk on your hands just to make the other person happy and feel on top of the world..

but what happens when it all goes hay wire??

all these thoughts and actions bounce back and bounce back hard..

for example

the songs you dedictated to each other seem to haunt you all day..

you cannot go to the places you have been together..

cannot even get close to the t shirt the other one loved..



sometimes it just aint enough..even if you go all the way and give it your 100%

thats what happened with rani in the movie..

the people she did everything for..didnt want her in their life..cause they werent ready to handle the burden and the mark..

thankfully she did have someone who realised her pain and stood up for her..







Love is like alcohol..

its gives you a bad hangover after you have had one of the most amazing nights of your life..

Wish

sometimes i wish i could turn back time..
sometimes i wish i could undo certain things i wasnt suppose to do..
sometimes i wish i thought about a decision well..before going ahead with it..
sometimes i wish i never loved some people in life whom iam addicted to right now..
sometimes i wish i could tell someone that it hurts..
sometimes i wish i wasnt so impulsive..
sometimes i wish i could cry like a baby..
sometimes i wish i could have a shoulder to cry on..
sometimes i wish i could get a beary hug when iam low..
sometimes i wish i could disappear..
sometimes i wish i could get that someone out of my life..
sometimes i wish i could express myself better..
sometimes i wish i would value the people who value me..

its not that i regret things..
its not that i want to erase somethings from the pages of my life..
not among those who would go back in time..and retrospect.. cause i inevitably land up remembering the bad times..
but just that when you think about how it has been for you till now..
how life has gone..how you have lived..
you do want to make an effort to improve yourself and the way you have been living..



its all in our hands at the end of the day..
its how we want it to be..
but guess we ignore this and blame it on circumstances or the other person..

Before I Die

there are a few things i want to do before i die..

want to share them on the blog..

will try to keep it down to a few

1) learn swimming

2) try my hand oops sorry feet at dancing (i suck at it big time)

3) get a car of my own (obviously with my own money as well)

4) convince my parents that chinese food isnt yucky

5) date a foreigner

6) adopt a baby girl

7) get rid of my fear of height+water=the swimming pool (cant get anywhere close to it)

8) go on a Blind date

9) learn scuba diving (if i succeed to get rid of my acute hydrophobia)

10) bunjee jumping

11) drive a ferrari or a maybach (once just once)

12) work abroad but only for a year

13) get a sea facing apartment

14) have a live in relationship (now now..i have been gettin weird responses..wonder where dis came from though..hehehe)

15) get so sloshed that i dont know where iam

16) dont have a hangover the next day (hehehehe)

17) have the purfect six pack abs (well iam almost there)

18) go backpacking in europe (alone)

19) get in touch with long lost friends

20) fly a plane and come out alive

hope to achieve some of these atleast..

lifes to short..and i want to make the most out of it..

alot of people are afraid to say what they want..

maybe thats why they never get what they want.

The Beginning

was contemplating about starting a blog of my own since the past couple of months..
bt wasnt too pumped about the idea..
the lazy bimbo that iam..
dint wanna go through the effort..
but guess the vacations have taken a toll on me..
and too much of free time on my hands has made me take this step finally..
have been a regualr reader of a couple of random blogs on the net..
and it always made me think how people pour their hearts out on their blogs..
well i hope i dont keep complainin much about life on this blog..
can be quite a cribber..but will avoid it here..

wishing myself best of luck..
and hope this association goes a long way..
will be back soon...

gonna pop some champagne right now :)